Stevie “Girlfriend” Case, a surgically enhanced young lady who is famous for not only being a really good Quake player (like Sharky's own “Vangie”), but also for being John Romero's girlfriend, and for not quite appearing in Playboy magazine (she was relegated to the online pictorial department) -- and most recently she was famous for being crowned a “Game God” in PCGamer Magazine – Hmmm… you know, oddly she's not at all famous for game or even level design, which has been her job the past few years…. Anyway, Stevie “Yoko Ono” Case made an announcement on her website (steveana.com) recently that states she's leaving Ion Storm and the game business to pursue “professional gaming”, Television, her website and possibly even film work. How much you wanna bet Eidos was sick of paying “the girlfriend” a salary? Anyway, Stevie is famous for thinking columns like mine are “mean.” Well, I'm actually a really nice guy; wait ‘til she gets national TV exposure. Good luck sweetie!

Gold

Age of Sail 2: Wooden men and iron ships! Wait, scratch that and reverse it.
Resident Evil 3: Nemesis and the battle of the wetwork S.T.A.R.Z.
Blade of Darkness: Hack two - hurl three.
NBA Live 2001: Take it to the hoop! (Take it to the cash register first though)

Released

Oni: Much more than the sum of its flaws.
Sim Coaster: In reality this is SimTheme Park 2, but they feel SimTheme Park didn't sell well because it wasn't named after a certain other amusement park game. Expect SimCoaster Tycoon next.
Carnivores Ice Age: Giant deer!? – Ah, sweet, sweet furry vengeance!

(Note: I've drawn the line at $20 and removed most expansion packs – unless they are new – from the ranking. This is to make the list more interesting for you and me. The number in parenthesis is the actual ranking of the game.)

Hey folks, I'm tapped out. Want a free game? The winner is the person who can come up with a joke for each of these games. Best list wins! Winner and winner's list announced in 2 weeks. Refer to past Beatdown PCDATA lists for a guide. Check out issues 40, 30, and 16 in particular.

1. The Sims – Maxis/EA
2. Roller Coaster Tycoon - Microprose/Infogrames
3 (5). SimTheme Park – Bullfrog/EA
4 (7). Command & Conquer: Red Alert 2 – Westwood/EA
5 (8). Everquest: Scars of Velious – Verant/Sony
6 (9). Barbie Pet Rescue – Mattel Interactive/GAMES Studios
7 (10). Frogger 2 - Hasbro
8 (11). Hoyle Casino 2001 - Hasbro
9 (12). Diablo II – Blizzard/Sierra
10 (13). Age Of Empires II: Age of Kings – Ensemble/Microsoft

A NOTE FROM MYSELF: Beatdown shall now be given unto you on alternating Fridays. So, I'll see you in two weeks!

BIO
Andrew is a professional journalist working in the PC entertainment field. He mocks because of his abiding love for the industry and his wise-ass upbringing. So, keep a sense of humor, even if you find his lacking. Comment? Critique? Vendetta? News Tip? Write him.