Marty McSorley bashed Donald Brashear's brains out last year and got himself suspended. He went before a court of law, with buddy Wayne “The Great One” Gretzky looking on, and argued that he: “(W)as trying to strike Donald Brashear high in the body, up around his shoulder area." His lawyer, a man named Smart, then asked if he intended to hurt Brashear. To which McSorley replied “No.” When playing NHL 2001 this season, in honor of Brashear (who may probably never play hockey again), I ask you edit the game to put McSorley back on the roster of his Boston Bruins and then spend the entire game bashing him until he his out for the season. But, for goodness sake, don't intend to hurt him as you send every hulking defenseman in the game toward him with the turbo button pressed!

Raducan Denied Medal: The IOC arbitration committee decided to uphold the decision to deny the 16-year old gymnast the Gold medal she won, because her doctor gave her cold pills containing the banned substance, psuedonephedrine. Did I mention that I'm on pseudonephedrine now? You should see my mad gymnastic skillz!

Milosevic Loses Election Yet Denies It: I think its high time we send in that Rainbow crew to take this guy down. Tap him, oh, say, twenty times for good measure.